Archive for January 2013
I saw this and it sounds like a really good idea. Now I know we’re now 27 days into the year, but I’ve had a bit of a difficult time so far this year…Yes, already!! So, getting a late start but starting today, Sunday, January 27th, I will get a small pretty box or jar and write down each time something good happens. And honestly, it doesn’t matter how small or insignificant it is. A small victory is still a victory, a tiny moment of happiness still a moment of happiness. They all add up. It’s something to work for. I need positive things in my life. I need these good moments that put a smile on my face. It’s important. Everyone does. I urge all of you to participate in this project. Bring some joy into your life. Celebrate each good thing that happens to you, no matter how big or small. And you can choose to share this with everyone, a select few, or just keep it special for yourself. Just don’t let those who are negative tell you it’s a stupid idea or a waste of time. These are people who fail to find the small joys in life, and that’s a sad way to live. I look forward to the end of the year and reading the many happy events that are sure to occur in the months ahead!
It’s been 4 months since I have posted here at Mom Is Gonna Run. Last time I updated, I shared with you the details about my first half marathon and the unfortunate downfall that came with it…something apparently every runner deals with at some point: their first running injury. Mine just so happened to have me off my feet, no weight baring exercising for a couple months, which put me in a bad place I’ve been struggling to get out of ever since.
Honestly, I’ve been okay to walk, jog, run, jump for awhile now. But I just haven’t gotten back out there. Maybe it’s the fear of getting hurt again. Maybe I’ve lost the drive and momentum I had for all those months, starting this time last year. Whatever it is, I’m having to give myself a swift kick in the bum. Race time is coming up.
In an effort to get me going, about a month ago I signed myself up for the Virginia is for Lovers Sweetheart 6k on February 9th in Virginia Beach. And here it is 24 days away and I’m definitely not ready for it. Not to mention, I’m registered for the Shamrock Half Marathon on March 17th, also in Virginia Beach, 60 days away, and I am not in half marathon shape. And this will be my 2nd half marathon. I should be more than on my way to being ready.
So what’s the problem? What’s the hold up? That’s something my body and my mind have been asking each other over and over again for weeks now.
I don’t know if this is part of the “quarter life crisis” situation from turning 30 in November. Maybe somehow I’m still a little depressed or in a funk or whatever because of it. I do have a lot going on. I have a lot to work on. A lot to work out in my life. A lot to change.
I just started college again last Tuesday. I haven’t been in school for quite a long while so this is a huge adjustment for me. And I’m taking 4 out of 5 of my classes at the college, as opposed to taking them all online. So, I am having to learn how to manage my time outside of a schedule, especially because these classes require so much studying and work outside the classroom during the rest of the week to be successful. I am very overwhelmed. In fact, I feel stupid. I have gotten a little panicky. There is so much I need to do, to organize, to take care of, and yet I have something that is now the biggest priority in my life, that I cannot fall back on, I cannot fail at. I cannot screw this up. This is my about my future, my daughters’ future. And I can no longer put that on the backburner and procrastinate and NOT take charge of it. I have to do my schoolwork and I have to do it well.
But I feel like there is so much chaos going on. So much disorganization, so much clutter. And though it’s only the 2nd week of the semester, I’m already behind. And that has my anxiety acting up at times, I can’t sleep a wink. Like right now. It’s 1 o clock in the morning and I will likely be awake all night.
I wish I could take care of everything at once. I know that’s impossible, but it still would be nice. If I could just not only catch up but get myself ahead, and get organized, I may be able to calm down. And maybe I would have enough determination and sense from then on not to drop the ball again. To always stay on top of things, no matter what.
Even the smallest things, such as my email, makes me anxious, chaotic feeling. I know it’s there. I know it’s cluttered and needs to be gone through and checked and read and responded to. I know certain lists need to be unsubscribed from. If getting my email sorted out can bring me a small amount of piece to get through other things and tackle them, that’s the first thing I will start with.
Yes, it’s definitely going to be a long, late, productive (no matter how insignificant it seems) night.
And how did I get from running to this? The joys of ADHD. Maybe I’ll get my mind organized soon, too. Bear with me!